Thursday, 13 March 2014

The life we want to show you

I'm pretty sure I've written about it before, but I've absolutely been loving Nina Nesbitt's Selfies lately. Have a little watch of the video and even a read of the lyrics because that's what I want to talk about today.

Whilst watching the video, one particular part jumped out at me and kind of left me, well, not reeling as such, but with a sense of oh my god that is so accurate wow. It was this:


Selfies... the life we want to show you. When have you ever instagrammed or tweeted or facebooked a photo of something you didn't want all your friends or followers to see? Never. Like, why would you want to appear less - for want of a better word - cool than you actually are? You just wouldn't. You put up a cute photo of your new tshirt like, oh I just went shopping, best day ever. Or maybe a photo of your super yummy lunch you made, and then a photo of your favourite candle and a book you're reading like, such a relaxing evening. Some particularly scheming (in my eyes!) people post photos of their revision guides and them surrounded in a sea of paper and notes to show how much work they're doing. To make themselves look good. I'm not saying they're not studying hard - they probably are - but they love to showcase it. Because it's what they want everyone to see.

I don't have instagram but I do have facebook and I do have this blog. If an unflattering photo of me makes its way onto facebook, I'll remove the tag and remove it from my timeline. If there's a photo in which I'm kind of on the edge of the group of people or I'm not talking to anyone in it, I'll get rid of that too. Because I feel like it makes me look like an outsider and that's not how I want to present myself to people. A photo which highlights my non-flat stomach? Goodbye photo. Double chin alert? Bad lighting? Straggly hair? Gone gone gone. I have the option to moderate what appears on my facebook, what my 561 friends see, so I do.

And I also have the option to moderate what you, you lovely readers, see on this blog. I'll only post photos of myself which I like (and perhaps there have been seventeen disgusting-looking ones before the one which ends up on here - you'll never know!). This also goes for my posts. Most of what I write on here is about places I've been to, photos of great parties, book reviews, haul posts, and the like. That's not fake - I have done all those things and read all those books and been to all those places.

But I don't write about how friendships with people I used to really care about are falling apart. That my BMI is veering towards the slightly overweight end of the average bar. That I have problems with my big toe and every step today was agony. That I can't ever find bras which fit, or that I feel stupid because I'm always so clumsy. I know, everyone has their issues and problems and that's kind of what this is about. We all have things that we're not happy with but the majority of us choose not to display that to the rest of the world. We show each other the good bits because that's what keeps us all happy.

I'm definitely not criticising that, or slating anyone, because I'm guilty of it too. And even if I wasn't, there's nothing shameful about not sharing everything with everyone. We show everyone the life we want to see, and that's fine. That really is absolutely fine.

1 comment:

  1. It's been ages since I had a proper good evening of blog reading, and I forgot how much I used to love visiting yours, Kate! I love a bit of Nina Nesbitt, and Selfies is one of my favourites! I think Nina (and you) are dead right about how we all select the best bits of our lives. Just because someone has a beautiful Instagram account, it doesn't mean that their life is instagram-worthy every day!

    Props to you, great writing here, Kate x